ACQUAINTANCE RAPE
(also known as date rape)

Rape—or any form of sexual assault—is a crime, regardless of who commits it.  It is motivated by power, domination, cruelty, and control.  Sexual assault happens when one person invades another person’s sexual boundaries.

What is acquaintance rape?

• When someone you know (friend, classmate, co-worker, teacher, romantic partner, date, etc.) touches you sexually without your consent; that is, through force, threats, trickery (including drugs and alcohol), manipulation, or coercion.
  
  
• It is a violation of you, your body and your trust.
  
  
• It is an act of violence, and it is a crime.

Some Facts about Acquaintance Rape:

• Anyone can be a victim.
  
  
• The vast majority of rapes occur in private places, most often the victim’s home or the home of the perpetrator (National Crime Victimization Survey, 2006; National Survey of Violence Against Women, 2006).
  
  
• Over 80% of all victims know the rapist.  They were friends, partners, neighbors, acquaintances, co-workers, fellow students… (Greenfeld, 1997, www.pcar.org; Fisher, 2000; National Survey of Violence Against Women, 2006)
  
  
• Only the offender is to blame; it is never the victim’s fault.

Sexual assault is not about sex, lust or passion. 
It is an act of power and control.

The acquaintance rapist is someone who...

• Believes that your consent to sexual activity is not necessary.
  
  
• Believes that using any means necessary to gain sexual contact is OK.
  
  
• Believes the myth that women say “No” when they mean “Yes.”
  
  
• Violates your personal boundaries.
  
  
• Disregards your feelings or wants.
  
  
• Takes advantage of your trust.

How to reduce your risk:
The following tips can reduce your risk of somebody being able to sexually assault you, but they cannot prevent it.  No matter what you do, it is still possible that someone could choose to hurt you.  And if someone does hurt you, no matter what you were doing, it is NOT your fault.  It is 100% the fault of the offender who chose to assault you. These are simply good ideas for staying safer:

1. Do not accept rides from strangers or
   people you do not know and trust well.
   
   
2. Avoid being in private places with strangers
   or people you do not know and trust well.
   
   
3. Avoid going to parties with someone you
   have just met or do not know very well.
   
   
4. Excessive drug or alcohol use can make
   you more vulnerable.
   
   
5. Watch out for the person who does not listen
   to your needs or concerns.  This person may
   not think that consent is necessary for physical contact.
   
   
6. Watch out for the person who cannot allow you
   to contradict him/her.  This person may use force
   if you try to express yourself.
   
   
7. Watch for the person who repeatedly violates
   your limits and puts you in a position of being
   uncomfortable, unable, or afraid to do anything to
   stop him/her (for example, someone who puts his or
   her hand on your waist after you have shown that you
   are uncomfortable with that, someone who makes fun
   of you for wanting to stop drinking, or someone who
   will yell at you for setting limits).
   
   
8. REMEMBER:   It is OK to leave a situation if a person
   exceeds or ignores your boundaries, limits or refusals.
   This does not make you “mean.”

Giving in is not consent!!!